chairs everywhere!

we stayed here a couple of days and it was very relaxing. there were one million places to sit in this house. in this room alone, there were forty-three thousand places to sit.

where skittles come from

we saw a piece of a rainbow up in wine country!

grolden grate bridge

here's a very confusing picture of us driving over the golden gate bridge.

san fran

emily and i went to san francisco and stayed in a really cool place with really fancy old junk

and a cool spiral staircase that went up to the roof where there is a really cool view of the city

and i'm pretty sure the place is haunted even though i didn't see or hear any ghosts. the place is super old. that's the only proof i have that it's haunted. it's gotta be haunted though, right?

nobody calls me chicken

i was kind of afraid to hold a chicken. emily was not very afraid. but of the three of us, the chicken was the most afraid.

bad taste

this poor girl is in love with an electric toothbrush. it'll never work out.

chickens!

 PATRICK GOT CHICKENS!

haircut

i got a haircut you guys!

outerspace bubbles

Monkey and Doghead thought it could never happen to them. but they were wrong. anyone can get trapped in an outerspace bubble. be careful out there, folks.

pretty darn good sammich

peanut butter, jelly, and banana. try it.

cool car club

i saw these two cool cars in the parking lot of the drug store. they wouldn't let my car park near them because it's not cool enough apparently. my car's pretty cool once you get to know it though. i tried to tell them that. but they didn't want to listen.

beyond competition

looks like bed bath and beyond has some competition. there's a new kid on the block and he's got 1200 thread count sheets. look out.

blanket fort!

momo made a blanket fort!

freeways and palm trees

california has a lot of freeways and palm trees.

headless cat

AAAAAAAAAAH! HEADLESS CAT!

toilet cannons from super mario brothers 3

these urinals kind of remind me of the cannons on the ships in super mario brothers 3.

sppork

half spoon, half spork = sppork

kazoos brothers

i saw this album at the record shop, didn't buy it, and have regretted it ever since. i don't even know what i'm missing but these guys HAVE to be awesome, right?

don't make him mad

momo is a very friendly cat but don't insult his intelligence or he will punch in the nose.

Mr. Doorknobnose

Mr. Doorknobnose is always whistling. ALWAYS!

bored cat

momo is so bored. i keep suggesting fun things to do and he just keeps saying "lame."

ice urinals

i, for one, like it when restaurants fill their urinals with ice. THERE I SAID IT!

i don't know the relationship these cats have

i saw these two cats hanging out on a roof and figured they must be best friends who share a common love of sitting on this roof. but then i thought maybe one is making fun of the other one and mocking his love of sitting on this roof. or maybe they both think sitting on this roof is dumb and so they're doing it as a joke. or maybe they've never even met but they both like this spot and so they're just lying there ignoring the other one. or maybe they don't even realize they are two separate cats. maybe they think they are one cat and so they just always do everything together. or maybe oh my god i've been staring at these two cats for an hour and a half.

headaches

i hit my head on the bottom of this pipe and nearly cracked my head open and had my brains fall out. actually it didn't even bleed. but there was a bump. and it hurt. i have hit my head a lot over the course of my life. one time when i was working at fedex i hit my head on a low beam and it was bleeding and even scalped me a little bit. it was very gross and i never told anyone because i was embarrassed.

the hair grew back.

good spot to sleep

"as far as spots to sleep go, this is the best one in the house!" -momo, the cat

not a butt

this looks like a little white butt. it's not though. it's a food called burrata and it tastes very good.

she's a good cook

emily's a really good cook and i'm a really good eater. we get along just fine.

humility is important

if you ever start to feel like you're a pretty normal looking person, just take a picture or yourself really close up with your phone. it'll keep you in check.

no arms or legs!

momo! where'd your arms and legs go?!

cartoon dog

this is where i plug in the thing i use to trim my beard. but also it kind of looks like a cartoon dog with a red ball in his mouth? or maybe that's his tongue? i guess the artist wanted it to be open to interpretation.

shower head

sometimes you can add "head" to a word and then it becomes a good insult-name to call your enemies (eg. butthead, craphead) or you it becomes a thing to call people who are really big fans of something (eg. deadhead, crackhead). but when you add it to "shower," it just means this thing.