Friday, December 5, 2008

did laundry today

did laundry today. while i was sitting there, some scraggly old dude came in and said "excuse me sir." i looked up at him and he says "do you run this place?" and i was like, "no. there's some guy over there ... i saw him working on one of the machine's over there. i think he runs the place." the scraggly old dude happened to be black, so i didn't want to describe the owner by his race and run the risk of appearing racist. but this dude was above all that and just said "asian guy?" "yeah," i said.

but i was flattered this guy thought i had my shit together enough to be running a laundromat. i mean, i don't. but he thought i did. i had just woken up like an hour prior and i'm sure i looked like i had just woken up an hour prior. and i was scribbling things for a MOVIE SCRIPT (so L.A.) on the back of a piece of paper. but this guy thought i looked like a laundromat operator! it really made me feel like i could make something out of myself. sincerely.

anyway, this dude finds the guy that runs the place and starts thanking him for something he did a long time ago that changed this scraggly dude's life. and the asian guy totally didn't remember the guy. and the guy's like, "well, i remember you!" and the asian guy didn't seem to care AT ALL that scraggly guy was seriously touched by something asian guy did. and scraggly guy came back all these years later to thank asian guy.

and i don't know if scraggly guy was crazy or something. i couldn't hear parts of the conversation. but i thought asian guy could've at least pretended to be happy for scraggly dude. asian guy was just blatantly uninterested.

but maybe it was a scam. that'd be a pretty good scam. go to a guy that deals with lots of people on a regular basis and say like "you probably don't remember me, but i sure remember you! i used to be a heroin addict until you did something that turned everything around for me." and then they're touched and all. and they want to continue to help you. so you say like "yeah, things have been getting a lot better. but it's hard for a convicted fellon to get back on his feet. let me borrow some dough!" and then you beat up the guy, steal his clothes, tie him up in the closet, and put his clothes on and PRESTO CHANGO, now you're running the laundromat! scam success!


Adam S said...

So, wait. If you had said, yes, you run the place, would he have then said that you were the man who'd changed his life?


schoolpants said...

that's a good question. if i had known that was coming, i definitely would've been more inclined to claim to have run the place.
but, judging by how quickly scraggly guy guessed that the guy i was describing was asian, i feel like scraggly dude really knew who he was after. if that's true, then when i would've said "yes, i run the place," scraggly guy probably would've said, "do you happen to know how i could get a hold of the previous operator?" and then i would be caught in a WEB OF LIES! and then the spider of lies would wrap me up in more webs of lies and then he'd chomp on my head with his teeth of lies. and digest me in his stomach acid of lies.

it doesn't pay to lie, adam.